letting in or letting go

if i let you in
will you tear me apart
rip me to shreds
when i tell my past
how long will you last
i've run for so long
i'm back to where i started
have i finished the race
or is it i couldn't keep up with the pace
so many questions
do i let you in
and tell you everything
i'm so afraid to let go of
to let myself fall in love
i quiver in fear
for the pain is forever present
it's everyday life
i can never escape
all my hate
exsists only in my head
no else hears the voices
no one else feels these fears
or sees these tears
are they blind
am i crazy
do i not matter
am i no important
to be asked if i'm okay
why i'm always in the way
i'll be alone
on my own path
i can't trust anyone
especially not me
i'll just let it be