until you can't anymore.

it comes around midnight.
that feeling, you know.
the one you get when you realize
someone has stopped loving you.

it's something like that.

when poetry forgot how to help mend the past
and you forgot how to pick up a pen
it all falls into place, leaving the blanks
to stay blank. and you just blame it on apathy
because it's easier than staying awake
in a star.less bedroom.

right around when the liquor stops soothing
and you're left wide eyed in heartache
because the past never gets tired
of ripping.you.apart.
it falls together- around the same time that
your fingers start twitching from lack of sleep.
and it's then. just right.
then.

that you realize- for the first time in your life
you're utterly lost.


and when words become just words.
pen and paper mean nothing
anymore.

More comments:

• On Sunday, February 21, 2010, Musik2MyEyes (353) wrote:
  
  I can't believe the words are right here...and I have been right there. Years of those hours have played over and over...it's maddening. A perfect write. I'm glad you were able to do it.
  
  
• On Wednesday, June 17, 2009, lovechild (43) wrote:
  
  i read this because it was your last post in '08. i almost wish i hadn't, because i am feeling this way now. my inspiration is dwindling and not even clutching desperately to my pld angst can seem to bring the pen to life. sometimes when you settle into a dream you realize that you can't dream anything else from where you find you have been lost.
  
  
• On Tuesday, June 2, 2009, Malice In Wonderland (752) wrote:
  
  You always seem to know...this was wonderful as always...not much else can be said...
  
  
• On Saturday, May 16, 2009, K_Love (596) wrote:
  
  Geez, it's so true. What a hard hitting feeling that you nailed perfectly.
  
  
• On Friday, April 24, 2009, Riven Waker (326) wrote:
  
  you purvey a real sense of emptiness her, in a most profound way - impressive work
  
  
• On Friday, April 10, 2009, ebonyamore (123) wrote:
  
  this ripped the heart right out of my chest and stomped it...wearing cleats...into a mud puddle. I didn't read this, I felt it.
  
  
• On Friday, March 27, 2009, Shortnlethal (90) wrote:
  
  i really related to this peom..i have very close loved one to me that at time he explains the same things as your have writen..and all i feel is pity and pain for him,..i really enjoyed reading this ^^
  
  
• On Tuesday, March 3, 2009, ColdScaredAlone (100) wrote:
  
  i've read this before, but i can never find the words to say. i feel it. more than i've felt a poem in years. i just feel it.
  
  
• A former member wrote: I feel utterly lost
  
  
• On Tuesday, February 10, 2009, DarkNephilim (6) wrote:
  
  I didn't know anyone could put to words what I've been feeling.. I've been trying and for the life of me I couldn't do it. I'm glad someone else understands.. that I'm not alone.
  
  
• On Thursday, January 22, 2009, Spiritus_Frumenti (365) wrote:
  
  i needed a wretched piece like this one today...this is the feeling i've been trying to put unto paper for days already...thank you for posting this...-l-
  
  
• On Tuesday, January 13, 2009, Lotophagi (419) wrote:
  
  just.... "yes".
  
  
• On Sunday, January 11, 2009, Jonas (820) wrote:
  
  this was amazing. you ripped out my balls on a pleasant sunday morning.
  
  
• On Friday, January 9, 2009, CharlottesWeb (599) wrote:
  
  Seems silly to say, but I felt a bit less lonely for this. A bit more understood, and I appreciate that.
  
  
• On Wednesday, December 10, 2008, Morbid_insanity (127) wrote:
  
  hmm... i think i lived this a couple of nights ago. its funny how empty life can make you feel. great write though
  
  
• On Sunday, December 7, 2008, urbanhumility (1350) wrote:
  
  residence is given to my own thoughts of love........jthrough your learned and well spoken prose........thanks Six
  
  
• On Friday, December 5, 2008, Choronzon (219) wrote:
  
  "because the past never gets tired of ripping.you.apart." If you ever stop writing, I'll kill myself.
  
  
• On Tuesday, November 18, 2008, Aleas (238) wrote:
  
  Coming back. I haven't felt like I've been hit by a train lately...
  
  
• On Tuesday, November 18, 2008, Alanarchy (1483) wrote:
  
  For real.
  
  
• On Wednesday, October 29, 2008, Disassembly Boy (79) wrote:
  
  *falls over*