is the only reason you people think this is "dark" is because I use the word "doom"?

*agrees with Mab* I like this poem dismal in everyway.

nine lines of impending darkness befalls upon us

So one could just as easily praise the subtlety with which your imagery and title work to imply an untimely and violent end of sorts... apocalyptic in small words... to paraphrase Marlowe commenting on Shakespeare.. 'infinite wisdom in few words'... you m

thanks. and yeah, some of it may seem tenuously strewn together, but I am reasonable content with this as tight. the quotations are because that is what he is thinking, but perhaps i err

how tied to the word 'trip' are ya... do you want the connotations it brings?

I'm thinkin you might be able to broaden the significance with a different word that brings more to the metaphor, and could also be taken more seriously since 'trip' has become so colloquial anymore

you make the colors and key terms carry the force of all significance... nothing short of the demise of the world.

which, of course, would then be genius akin to Hemingway's style, for those who like Ernest....

gotcha... hey, I dont get the trip of doom quote, and I wonder if it should be in quotes, and I think there should be a question mark... not just for punctuation but to force the question as such... I like the imagery, but it is somewhat sparse... maybe t

there is a theme that ties into the question, but I don't see. is that better, dude?

i mean, i take it the sun is bleeding, right? and that this is a way of perceiving the rain/storm portending, but I'm not sure i see this as foreboding enough for 'doom'.. ya know? maybe if the imagery were a bit more harsh, somehow, then doom would match

but ya know fuckin aesthetic criticism is just a bunch of blah blah blah unless there are mutually agreed upon criteria... all subjective, so what's the point in being more than appreciative of differences? I mean, this is the question for all value theor

theory in the postmodern, multicultural age... hence Rorty's Death of Philosophy' where art criticism is aesthetics... field of phil.

could you oeople respond in any more of blase fashion?

do what?

Strong, simple.

nine lines..with such impact.