About seven or eight years ago, I discovered my bisexuality.
I looked at my friends, who at the time were comprised of mostly
females, and I found that I liked some of them, not that being
friends wasn't enough. I hadn't planned it. I hadn't been
thinking about it. It just kinda snuck up on me. I was thinking
about what I was going to eat, looked at one of them and *SNAP*.
I liked her. I really liked her. Ever since that day, I have
found women to be just as attractive as men, and in many cases,
more so.

She was one of my best friends. Part of my clique.

Being one of her best friends, I knew things like the fact that
she had a boyfriend, and was happy with him. Now, knowing that
I decided that nothing would ever happen between us, simply
because of the fact that I beleive that love knows what it's
doing and interfering with it's intensions, never works. If she
and I were going to be together, it would happen. If not, then
not.

I went on like that all through high school. Loving the girls
from afar. I flirted with some of the single ones, but nothing
ever happened. Now I don't want you to think that I am having
problems facing my bisexuality. I am having problems with the
people that try and tell me I'm not.

Quite often I get asked:
"How many women have you been with?"

To which I answer:
"What's your definition of 'been with'?"

They usually answer:
"Had sex with."

Now up until this point I'm doing fine. I'm great, still
comfortable and totally willing to answer whatever questions they
want to ask. (I'm a very open person. I'm one of those "Ask me
anything" kinda people. Ask me a question and no matter how
personal, I'll answer it.) The next little bout of 20 questions
is what gets on my nerves.

I answer:
"I haven't actually had intercourse with any women, if that's what
you mean, but I did participate in a threesome with a girl...I
never really did more than sucking on her nipples though."

To this I almost always get one of the following...
"So you're not really bi are you?" Or...
"Then you're just bi-curious."

I AM NOT! I know who I am atracted to and who I'm not. I like
girls...I like boys...I have found only one catagory that I
could possibly fit into. Bisexual. I hate when people try to
tell me I'm not bisexual. It's like suddenly my sexuality is on
trial. Each group has their own little ways of annoying me.

For those who tell me that I'm not bi, usually heterosexuals,
 I feel like suddenly I don't know what the hell I'm talking
about. I try to explain to them my feelings towards members of
my own sex, and they say that since I have never been with a
woman, complete with sexual intercourse, then I'm not bi, I'm
heterosexual with lesbian tendencies.

I love that term..."Lesbian Tendencies".

It's about as hetero a term as they come. I've never in my life
heard someone who is homosexual or a lesbian say that I have
"lesbian tendencies". And if I explain to them my Demi Moore
fetish, they act like I'm making this up. If I were making this
up, I'd make up something more interesting. Like a fetish for
french poodles or something.

The other group, which is the group that tells me I'm bi-curious
irks my nerves even more. This group is comprised of the
full-flegged homosexuals, male and female alike. I get the same
response. Again my sexuality is on trial. Only this time,
instead of the heterosexuals telling my I'm hetero I get the
homosexuals telling my I'm hetero.

They often tell me that until I have my first "experience" I'm
not really bi, I'm just thinking about it. I'm "curious" about it.
Please. This from the person who just used the term "experience"
to describe my first sexual encounter with my own sex. Like it's
so hard to say "Until you have your first sexual encouter with a
woman..." I mean, come on. If you want to get really up close
and personal about MY sexuality, then at least you could be
blunt and honest and say "Until you eat a woman out, your just not
bi." If you're gonna try to explain to me my sexuality, then
don't be shy about it. No matter how you put it, it's gonna
bother me. Like I always say: A bag of shit is a bag of shit,
no matter how pretty the bag looks.

I also love it when people find out I'm bi and the first thing
that comes out of their mouths is:
"Really? Do you have a girlfriend right now?"

To which I lovingly answer:
"No...right now I'm engaged to be married to my boyfriend. HELLO!
Bi does NOT equal lesbian! What made you think I had a girlfriend?"

To THIS I receive a plethora of funny looks and brush off looks.
Like it's my fault that they assumed that bisexual females
automatically have a girlfriend.

I don't know. I guess that eventually we're all going to have our
sexuality branded onto our arm in the form of a barcode that we
can scan, along with our sexual history. And I'm sure I'm going
to have to go through a series of tests to verify to the tattoo
artist over in the easy-boy that I'm bi, so that he can move the
machine over and publish it.

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