What is the definition
For myself?
There's so many sides
Am I coming out
Of my protected shell
Am I someone else?
Do I need help?
I've been left alone
Now, what have I done?
Duck down into a corner
With water stained walls
But yet I’m dancing
But it's only inside my head
That I continue to skip along
Ignoring reality
But I do,
I promise you
I am trying
Though you can not tell
There's no visible effort
But these tears that spill
They've been there for years
And on this night
I've slipped
And I’ve cried
Lead tears
Of years of sorrow
And years of pain
They've weighed me down
And I’ve held them in
For far too long
But I am trying
Told keep them back
Even for a day longer
I am trying, I promise
Because just like you
All I want is happiness
But I know I’m slipping
These lead tears are proof
That love can not cure all
No lack of emotions
Just lack of touch
But yet we're normal
Our relationship
Is more stable
Then anyone's I know
But what is going on
Why do I pretend
And act like
It all means nothing to me
Or bloody separation
Yet inside I’m falling
Twirling around
Caught inside
Wrapped in a spider's web
Never to be fully released
Only dragged down deeper
I can't work this out
Only time can heal
This torn and wounded heart
Sleepless nights, with no comfort
Only with haunting nightmares
Or pleasant dreams of us together
Only to awake alone
I'm screaming inside my head
I'm aching for your lips
Your voice,
Echoes through my mind
As long forgotten times
Dwell heavily on my soul
Another two and a half months
Is way to long
To wait for happiness
For tonight seems like
It has taken forever
Yet it's still not over
As I continue to cry
These lead tears of mine

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