Say it all you want,
"You're not goth, you don't cut your wrists."
Well, try living in my shoes,
Try to survive a life like this.
Everyday I wake up in this place,
Mostly wishing I were dead.
Don't think for a second that you know me,
Or what goes on inside my head.
Trust me, I'm more fucked,
Then you could ever think I am.
Don't think I can pull this trigger?
Oh, I think I can.
Don't think I'll swallow the last of these pills?
I have done that before.
Dont try to tempt me to stop,
I'll just swallow more.
Maybe thats a good thing,
Then you wont have to deal.
Maybe next time I'll press down harder.
The wounds won't have time to heal.
You don't even know your own kid.
How unbelievably sad can you be?
Don't worry, I don't know me either.
I don't even think the others see.
I don't think they see the pain,
Or the anger that is inside.
I don't think they see the scars,
I'm desperatly trying to hide.
Sometimes I just want to shake you,
And show you my mutilated arms.
Sometimes I want help,
So I'll stop my self-inflicted harm.
Sometimes I actually want to show you a real smile,
But the anger inside wont allow me.
Sometimes I want to scream at you,
Maybe then, you will leave me be.
You seem to think it is so easy,
To put the razor down and say no.
Don't you think if it was that easy for me,
I would have stopped along time ago??
Maybe someday I will get better,
And you can have your daughter back.
But right now, Dad, I need this pain,
So I wouldn't count on that.
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