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"...and it was beautiful." by torn_beauty

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The ground was covered in ice,
a perilous sea lay before me.
Almost like lifes indiscrepencies,
lying here and there, all before me.

Sorrow has a small place in my heart,
like a tiny stain that will never go away.
should it spread I would be greatful,
it would make not such a scene.
Just like me, so small,
in this ocean of uncertainty.
Like a beautiful blanket of heart break
ruined by my presence.

The dawn came today and it was beautiful.
I didn't see it, I just knew.
I was blinded by my sheets,
my empty hurt kept me tangled somehow.

As I walked forward I slipped,
not falling in or out.
Wish I could see why I just glided across,
across that plane.
As if I was a crazy dancer,
I moved across on a grace that was not my own.
Silence was my partner,
and it was beautiful.






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If you [Log In] as a member you can discuss this work with others

On Tuesday September 4th, 2007, Bridge (347) writes:
i'm not exactly sure what to say..but i felt this..it was great..


On Sunday January 28th, 2007, BoldSolitude (278) writes:
I really liked the analogy of the ice being a perilous sea, never quite thought of it like that, i also liked the Silence was my partner, it really portrays a sense of loneliness


On Tuesday January 16th, 2007, TwilightMelodies (1093) writes:
"my empty hurt kept me tangled somehow." Goodness, this piece is filled with gorgeous imagery and lullabyes one can only hear when whispered across the breeze...beautifully done. ~*Beth*~


On Tuesday January 16th, 2007, TwilightMelodies (1093) writes:
as for your title dilema, I suggest taking your favorite line from the piece and shortening it into a title...such as..."Empty Hurts and Tangled Limbs" or something to that effect.


On Tuesday January 16th, 2007, Spiritus_Frumenti (344) writes:
nice poem...you used the word beautiful 3 times so i guess naming it something beautiful would be appropriate...-l-


On Wednesday January 17th, 2007, torn_beauty (104) writes:
why thank you all but i think beautiful or something would be appropriate. fabulous.


On Tuesday January 16th, 2007, LordBrosnian (65) writes:
Excellent work. My ego would love to absolve your dilema. Unfortunately, I can not find a common theme to bind it all. So, you, being the writer and the holder of its meaning, must name it. Beautiful.


On Tuesday January 16th, 2007, anakronistik_me (42) writes:
i am in awe...



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Printed from www.DarkPoetry.com/dp/7213/92922 on Monday July 07th, 2008 01:47 AM

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