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"tortured mind" by alone

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shadows of deception
paths of unpaved lyes
the evil force becomes us
as the bird no longer flys

fear of all lifes evil
pain upon all pain
a game of all lifes worries
where we never make a gain

hurt upon confusion
shame upon us all
slowly we shall perish
as one by one we fall

the force that is against us
to our unpleasant fate
a long and unjust journy
a guiding field of hate

wounds of immortality
unpleasant tortured mind
fealings of disturbance
forever we will find!



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If you [Log In] as a member you can discuss this work with others

On Sunday July 20th, 2003, Saint_Reaper (288) writes:
if we stick together.....we will never fall........i lub you!!!


On Saturday May 24th, 2003, Ravenblade (274) writes:
Very good write, it has a very good flow until that last line, and the rhythm is simple, and the rhyme scheme is cinsistent in a good way. If you haven't figured out, rhythm and flow are my biggest fetishes in poetry


On Friday May 16th, 2003, Twilight (2101) writes:
i love the last verse...fuck it...i love the whole thing. the feeling is so real and it is something everyone can relate to.


On Monday May 12th, 2003, Midnight Phoenix (313) writes:
hurt upon confusion... shame upon us all... -I love it.


On Thursday May 8th, 2003, hate_doll (328) writes:
wow...I like the rhyming scheme...and the images and the whole emotion put forth. I really like :)



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Printed from www.DarkPoetry.com/dp/708/6668 on Friday October 10th, 2008 06:00 PM

Certain elements © 1996-2008 Matthew Steven (matts.org)