You say that you're so different
That you don't want to leave
Maybe if I tell you what you want to know
You won't still want to be with me

What exactly would you say
If I told you why I hide
Why I try to fade into all this black
That comes from deep inside

Do you ever wonder why
My eyes linger on the stars
Or why I wish to join them
What about the scars

Do you wish that I were different
Maybe more like you
Do you even begin to realize
I can't be who you choose

You tried so hard to catch me
And now that I've been caught
You know exactly who I am
I'm nothing that you thought

I put on a new face each day
Just so people think I'm happy
Now that you know just how I feel
Do you still want to be with me

You found me all alone one day
While I was trying to hide
You kissed me on my sweet black lips
As if I were some kind of prize

I thought that you were stupid
And looked the other way
I wished that yo'd just shut up
I just hoped you'd go away

You were all dressed in Tommy
I was all in black
I have no idea what you saw in me
Or why you wanted me so bad

But you were quite persistant
And asked me please don't leave
I told you I was fed up
With pricks like you hitting on me

You tortured me with your presence
And begged me please to stay
So I told you I was abstinent
Then I walked away

You followed me for quite some time
While I just kept on walking
You grabbed my wrist and looked at me
And then you started talking

When at last you spoke to me
Without anger in your eyes
You made me feel so damn naive
Somehow I knew you couldn't lie

You treated me with respect
For that you had no cause
Because in my book of rules
You had broken all the laws

I respect what you did that day
By trying to make a stand
But no matter what you say
You'll never comprehend

You have no idea who I am
Do you know what I have done
Did you know that in a single night
I was raped and killed someone

A few weeks later I made a choice
A choice of life or death
She didn't yet have a voice
Yet I heard her in my head

Then nine months later
I layed there on the cutting table
Screaming out in forced labor
18 hours later I gave birth to an angel

Then I made another choice
As I placed her in the hands of a mother
If I knew then what I know now
I still would have given her to another

All my life all I ever wanted
Was to be rid of my dear dad
He beat me bloody, broke my jaw
Then told me I was bad

Then one day my mother came
Said you need to leave this home
So ever since the age 16
I've lived out there on my own

So what exactly can you say
Do you think you can make this better
Do you honestly think I want to stay
In your perfect little world

You can keep your perfect life
And your perfect family
Why can't you please
Just stop torturing me

I'm sorry that you love me
It's a pity that you do
I have to deal with my own life
To deal with the shit I've been through

You and I both know that
I love you more than I say I do
For that I'm truly sorry
Because I can't stand to be with you
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This is dedicated to those who think they know me

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