DarkPoetry -|- mysticventures -|- Rites of Passage

Rites of Passage

two young boys dance rythmically around a raging fire

half naked, sweat gleaming off their heaving chests

they dance on

as their younger brother keeps a frenzied beat

on a home-made drum made of human flesh

they dance on

until the charred and blackened ashes of their father

scatter in the night's wind like dying fireflys

they dance on

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Comments on Rites of Passage

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On Wednesday November 3rd, 2004, mysticventures (546) writes:

naw, just a primitive fantasy piece! still it's one of my favorites :)

On Tuesday October 12th, 2004, elisa (2018) writes:

this reminds me of the never ending cry of mankind...where the proof of a soul comes with so much heartache... nice:) elisa

On Sunday October 3rd, 2004, An Expired Member (46) writes:

i love the image that this painted in my mind.. i really do. fabulous, i really like this

On Sunday September 12th, 2004, Mr King (623) writes:

I see... Life itself.... You are indeed a master of symbolism! 1,Seth

On Saturday September 11th, 2004, An Expired Member (18) writes:

I liked this alot. You were able to get a point across with very few words. Painted a picture in my mind. I enjoyed reading it.

On Saturday September 11th, 2004, Zophiel (349) writes:

Reminds me of my OA initiation in the scouts.

On Saturday September 11th, 2004, mysticventures (546) writes:

thank you Anth *feels humbled*

On Saturday September 11th, 2004, anth (1611) writes:

what you captured here,behind the words is awesome,the grand meanings,in each verse,im very impressed,directly to the very core of things,a kind of reverance expressed here too

On Saturday September 11th, 2004, anth (1611) writes:

yeah, i really love this,one of your best

On Thursday September 9th, 2004, MEATGRINDER MAN (510) writes:

You know, Mystic? This poem reminds me of a story I wrote called SKINS AND BONES. Perhaps I will post it on DP so you may view it. ~Shane~

On Thursday September 9th, 2004, The Kid Of Corruption (148) writes:

I dont know, Its close. But all in all I think I like this version a tiny bit better. Tell you it got me to think, lol

On Thursday September 9th, 2004, mysticventures (546) writes:

something wasn't quite right - had to make a change in this - couldn't sleep until I did -

On Thursday September 9th, 2004, lordshadow (215) writes:

Imaginative and visual. One of my favorites.

On Thursday September 9th, 2004, DarkWolf (447) writes:

Seems ancient.. and primative. I liked it. -Michael

On Wednesday September 8th, 2004, An Expired Member (35) writes:

wow this is great. man your good.

On Wednesday September 8th, 2004, TheReap (42) writes:

quite the imagination there dude!

On Wednesday September 8th, 2004, ONEANDLONELY (137) writes:

Complete..and yet...left with questions...

On Wednesday September 8th, 2004, The Kid Of Corruption (148) writes:

Hmmm wow. I do like this alot Mystic. Classic mystic write, lol gotta love it.

On Wednesday September 8th, 2004, Loketha Angel (158) writes:

this...this...this...is weird, yet beautiful all in the same way, enchanting yet freightening. i like it. not many can i say this about ¢ï¢ï

On Wednesday September 8th, 2004, An Expired Member (12) writes:

I think it's just me, but this poem creeps me. In a strange way. Must be your words, and the way you composed it, so exceptionally, unusually interesting

On Wednesday September 8th, 2004, Dayer (201) writes:

it creeped me a bit as well, but in a good way

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