Did you make her scream?
Did you think of me?
Or was the testosterone enough to make you forget
those things I couldnt bring myself to say?
Who do I blame when the sand shifts beneath my feet
leaving just one set of footprints?

And would you come and carry me the rest of the way
when the pain is too much and the wind is too cold?
Dropping to the sun baked grains of sand,
that try so desperately to fend off the cold cold dark,
scraping knees to scream your name.
But no sound leaves me
And you still dont know where I am.

Not that you've bothered to wonder these last few fateful days,
with prettier things than me on more than your mind.

And what can I do when I cant hide any longer?
Hating the solitude as much as I hated the crowd that day you found her.
Could I have stopped this?
Do you know this hurts me?
Of course you do.
I hurt you first.
Its only fair.

Test the waters before diving into the tidal wave
hoping the chaos will swallow me whole
so i'll never have to try to explain.
But the waters betray and slam me to shore
choking on my own fear
shaking at your feet.

With so much regret spawned by so much guilt
I reach for you,
begging your forgiveness.
And just as my fingertips graze you flesh
I see the other set of feet just next to yours,
too close for my comfort.

And you turn, together,
away from this vast and tossing sea
My touch nothing more than the brush of a lonely fish,
flopping and gasping for air.
Too far up the beach to go back
but finding, for the first time,
that I cannot breath this air.

And by the time I wonder where you've gone
it is too late.
And i die one more time without you.

The sand is cold and so am I.
But you'll never feel this frost with the heat you two can make.
Later you'll learn,
when you lift that fork and tuck into le filet of me,
that revenge isnt the only dish best served cold.

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