Like the first tear that falls,


Tracing sadness down a


Well known path,


Paving the way


For the torrential cascade


of regret...





I fell for you.





Convinced, all the while,


I was falling


into


you





Into something beautiful,


Something new...





New sensations,


.


(lust)


.


New stirrings of emotion,


.


(love)


.


just barely wished for...





A song on the tip of my tongue.


Fingers aching,


throbbing,


To play this melody...





Only


for


you.





But you, oh you,





You ripped out my tongue,


that day,


and left me speechless.





Each step


Away from me





A


SPINAL


TAP





x-sensory.deprivation-x





.numb.





Did you know


As you walked away,


(but then again, how could you not?)


That you would leave me


Devoid of faith,


of hope,


of feeling...


With nothing left of myself


to give


To Anyone.


Anyone but you...





THIS APATHY ENDS NOW!





You don't deserve this devotion...





And still I worship blindy.


Sinning daily


if only to feel your retribution-


your love-


your hate-


Anything.


from.


you.


Everything for you...





I want to be your sacrifice...


(your jesus christ)


(your bitch)





Rusting nails,


Tearing flesh,


Raping new holes,


Spreading this infection,


In an already tortured soul.





Drawing the weak,


(come and be a martyr!)


Like poison from a wound,


To spit them at your feet...


A whole fucking congregation


Bowing down to you!





Distracting your ears from my screams...





So many beautiful mourners.


Tears


Always were more attractive than


Blood...


(I can never forgive that complex beauty equation...


That left me


(Ø)


nothing


to


you.)





FUCK THIS SACRIFICE!


(it means nothing to you)


I should be their idol...


(they mean nothing to you)


(so spank me and call me billy...)


NOT


YOU!


END THIS CRUCIFIXION!


NOW!





Burning with the fires of the morningstar


I RISE!


(i defy your glory)


Rise to the stars,


Far beyond any heavens...


A brilliant sparkling effigy


to all the shit


you


put us


through.





THIS SUBJECTION ENDS NOW!





It's always hardest to convert the ignorant...


Easiest to attract the weak.


(cum)

(to me)


The best lesson i learned


from


you.





I've been MARTYRED!


RETARDED!


Completely DISCARDED!


just remember-


It was you


who started this...


(decay)





THIS SILENCE ENDS NOW!





When all you've loved is ripped


from


your


fingers


And


your world is seething


Nothing more


than


dust and ash.


Raped


to its very core-


Remember-


(and never fucking forget)


that you are the one


who drove in these nails


and


left me with this disease


(sic.)


to rot and fester


within my soul.





You are the one


Who started this war.











(hate.)

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