It’s a continual car crash and I’m left eating asphalt.
Gripping the guardrail. Wishing it wasn’t there today.
Confined inside a snow globe I watched the snow. fall.
I wish I could feel what it was like to die as soon as you hit pavement.





I swear I’m not that breakable.




It was another one of those days.
Where the sun tries so hard to break.
Glittering in your eyes, at the distant sign of sorrow.
Begging you to pull the clouds back.




But maybe I wasn’t ready for morning.





Maybe I was stuck inside bed.
Wondering where this road I’m on is taking me.
Wandering away from every word just so I can disown your next sentence.
I wish you’d stop writing.





Just so I could take all my words back.





&.





There I was on the bedroom floor.
Cutting out the latest promises inside of magazines.
Pasting you a picture of everything I couldn’t be.
Spitting out the remnants of a car crash still happening. Within.






I swear.










I’m not that.














Breakable.









I never knew what it was like to feel so alone.
Empty analogies and sewed off decisions.
I’d give you anything now.
Just to flutter free.









Free.










But maybe I wasn’t ready.
For morning.
You slipped inside of me so easily.
Begging with your eyes.










&.







I didn’t expect us to crash so beautifully.
& The sky to fall so gracefully.
Dusting our heads with silver linings.
& All I wanted was for it to end.







There was nothing that day.
And while we all paused. and broke.
I was standing whole.
Waiting to separate dry wings.








Waiting.










Just to feel crushed between concrete.
As you tasted honey on my lips.
Because while you broke me so well.
I never felt so alive

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