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"myrid kunim carcanagie" by knightmirror

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sli/de.rangement
across the filthy floor
like a game of shuffleboard
slamming confused thoughts together

ba/sh.if.ted/ious
emotions into piles of cork
like a dull dart stuck in the
bullseye impaling its horn's into me

w/his..pe../red
schemes playing /i/n/sideways
of darkened all/e..y.s

reeking
like the bog
of eternal stench

g/rand.om/inous
shadows blanket interior
walls of deceptive elegance
with glimmering wallpaper of sinning

slip/ped.is.tal/com
powder filled nostrils
alter perception and allow
entities to enter this innocent soul

w/his..pe../red
schemes playing /i/n/sideways
of darkened all/e..y.s

reeking
like the bog
of eternal stench

can you smell
the sin
on my
breath?



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If you [Log In] as a member you can discuss this work with others

On Friday December 10th, 2004, Sin (1622) writes:
wow, this read like a vision of falling from grace...and the last line just clenched it..wonderful as always Chris


On Sunday October 31st, 2004, Anth (1571) writes:
heh,reminded me of labyrinth again-superb write here,one of my faves of your latest ones


On Wednesday October 13th, 2004, Bakkhus Unbound (1101) writes:
'shadows blanket interior walls of deceptive elegance with glimmering wallpaper of sinning' Brilliance! Love the title, even though it has me perplexed; feels...dark; ritualistic: like a naked lunch drug.


On Tuesday October 12th, 2004, batman nipples (2257) writes:
The last line was like needles on my flesh...this is exceptionally written.


On Tuesday October 12th, 2004, TheProphetUntold (371) writes:
Insanely clever and astounishing. Bring me to depths of thoughts I haven't dared plunge for a while. +T.P.U+


On Tuesday October 12th, 2004, indefined (679) writes:
man, superb! extremely interesting way to start each stanza, really makes you look and puzzle it out, very unique. loved the content too, pat yourself on the back mate.


On Tuesday October 12th, 2004, glasshouse (771) writes:
Oh... wow. This fills the senses on every level. Never have I felt so complete and so naked at any time. I love this piece. -Glass


On Tuesday October 12th, 2004, Zhee (638) writes:
i loved the way you ended this.. great write...


On Tuesday October 12th, 2004, purr_verse (1423) writes:
"g/rand.om/inous" - damn cool. :) Dammit, I give up - what does the title mean? i love the way it sounds in my head... I also love the sharpsick sly squalor of the closing stanza... (whee, i slipped in alliteration.) great write! :)


On Tuesday October 12th, 2004, An Expired Member (10) writes:
nice surreal images all over the place. nice write!


On Tuesday October 12th, 2004, elisa (1991) writes:
'...powder filled nostrils...' I remember the smell of that sin all too well...the many seeds of savages....amazing thought:) elisa



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Printed from www.DarkPoetry.com/dp/4320/47619 on Friday December 05th, 2008 09:45 AM

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