I know that hate
Is a very strong word
And people tell me
that I'm not supposed to hate
But I do hate him
And I do love him
Is it possible to love somebody
But hate them at the same time
Because I do
And I'm not sorry for it
I'm not sorry for hating him
But I can't help but love him
He is my blood
And people tell me
That I don't have to love him
Just because he is my father
But I do love him
And I do hate him
All at the same time
And I can't help but hate him
For all the abuse
He bestowed apon me
And I can't forget
The words he said to me
And how I cried
Until the tears ran dry
And my eyes got puffy
I can't forget how
He was supposed to be in my life
But wasn't
And I can't forgive him
For not being there
To guide my through
My growing days
And people tell me
That it's good to forgive
And that I should forgive
But I don't want to
And they can't understand that
Because they don't understand me
They don't know
The depths of my pain
Or the darkness of my thoughts
They will never know
And I don't want them to
Because if they understand me
Then I won't be able to confuse them anymore
With my poetic verses
And my uncontrolable trances
I like the fact
That I confuse them
And I like to know
That they will never understand
Because it's something all my own
And it's all in my head
And people tell me
That he doesn't mean what he says
But it doesn't matter
There is no forgiveness
In my heart of pain
Because I will always hate him
And I will always love him
Equally the same
No less and no more
Than the other
And maybe it's not possible
To hate and love someone
At the same time
But I do

If you [Log In] as a member you can discuss this work with others