Nothing is the same
anymore.
A room full of strangers
I once knew well
has left me
empty.
I'm alright, though.
I'm okay.
I'll be fine.
Don't worry.
[Head throbbing
with the pain of
nothing
and the ache of
something.
Something I don't deserve.
...never will...]
It's hard being wonderful
all the time.
[Midnight is the worst.
.my bed is too big
to share.
I sleep on the couch.]
Smoke fills the room
as I disappear in a bottle.
Smooth, clear, and comforting.
not good, I suppose.
With clouded eyes
and double vision
I don't care.
At least I control something.
Without it
I'm empty.
[Keep the lights off
so I can't see
I'm the only one here.]
Sleeping merely to dream
an escape from myself.
But I wake knowing
I was dreaming.
It doesn't matter anymore.
Watching my life shatter
with a little plastic button
I loathe
yet use so often.
[What's the point?]
If my emotions were visible
would I deserve words as well?
"Everywhere I look
You're all I see
Just a fading fucking reminder
Of who I used to be"
I'll be fine, though.
Don't worry.
I'm always alright
in the end.
These nights just get to me
sometimes.
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