It was never a secret, I wanted to be a good mom and a good homemaker before anything else since I was little.

I never saw anything wrong with it. I never thought I would be criticized for wanting to stay home with my children, wake up before anyone to prepare breakfast, make everything from scratch, keep the house straightened up and clean, help them with all of the homework, not just checking it's been done, doing lots of activities with them etc.

One critique I often hear is that housewives are choosing the easy way out, they want a husband who works hard all day so they can spend the day at the spa. Well, yes you do have women who do that. They have a maid who does the cleaning and cooking, and a nanny who raises the kids.

However, these women are not housewives, the only thing they have in common is the fact that they don't work for their income.

Deciding to become a housewife is not taking the easy way out. Because you do not work, people look down on you and think you are a lazy person who does nothing all day. If anything looks less than perfect, you are accused of slacking off. If you are tired, people ask "but what did you do all day to be tired"? And for the same reasons, you are rarely appreciated for everything you do. And you may not work from 9 to 5, but does you work day really end at all?

Why then, would anyone decide to be a stay at home mom? I can't answer for everyone, but personally, I believe I have very valid reasons. I do not want to leave in the morning after having seen my children for less than an hour. I do not want to come home to them tired and irritated. I do not want to simply verify they have done everything they were supposed to, I want to do it with them. I do not want to feed them quick meals, I want them to eat something nutritious that was prepared with love and care, even if it took time. I want to be there with them anytime they have a holiday. I want to have the time to take them to fun and artistic classes, and be there when they want to show me what they learned.

I also can't bear the thought to see my husband for a few hours a day, when we are both tired. I want to be able to feed him well, take good care of him, take care of the house he bought for us to show him how grateful I am.

The bottom line is, while most working women and housewives both spend their day doing something with their family in mind, working women do it through earning an income while housewives do it through direct caring. I do not think that any of these women are superior, better, etc. We all want the same thing, we want to be happy and make our families happy, we just chose a different way to do it.

Some might say that women in the early 20th century fought to give me rights, and I should take advantage of them instead of degrading myself by staying home. But these people forgot what the feminists really wanted. They wanted women to choose what is better for them, they wanted them to have choices and the right to do what men do if that's what they want. Forcing women to be in the work force is just as wrong as forcing them to stay home, we should be free to do what we want as long as we can afford it and we are not hurting anyone.

For the record, I am not a housewife. I am currently a student, who by the time she is 26 will have a law degree and a psychology degree. I will also work part time, and probably full time until I have children. I just hope that one day I will be able to fully dedicate my life to my family through being a homemaker, and hope people will understand why even if they do not necessarily agree, and that they will spend their energy trying to make this world a better place instead of wasting time criticizing those who choose to live differently.

Why is it that we always have to antagonize a certain group of people?

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