feminine

strong enough for a man,
yet made for a woman...

yes, i typically wear deodarant
made for a woman, mostly
i like the smell, and the way
it works all day, unlike
old spice which makes me
smell worse than if i didn't
wear any at all...

i'm five foot seven,
a hundred and almost
twenty pounds.

yes, i also wear girl's jeans,
but only on occassion, for
if i wore a size thirty waist
and thirty-two length, i'd
either drown and get lost
in them or look like fifty cent
(and shouldn't it be cents?)

i also say (only typically if
i'm asked) whether or not
a guy is good-looking.
i like bright eyes obsessively,
listen to tegan and sara, and
play the violin.

these wonderful things neither
make me emo, nor do they make me gay

they say i think for myself...
i have my own preference...
i know what works for me...
i don't give you a hard time for liking lil john...
though maybe i should...

masculine

oy! i drink whiskey with the rugby
kids, and i sing their songs that
make absolutely no sense...

i wear a bandana in my back pocket,
not because, i belong to the 8th street
cryps, but because it's handy dandy in
emergencies, like a cut or if i need to blow
my fucking nose. and yes, i could still kick
your lolly gagging gangsta wanna-be
ass, i've seen more real shit than
your rappers can talk.

actually, i prefer whiskey to anything,
except a good gin and tonic...

i love football, hockey, and baseball.
i'll drink the beer (though i'd rather have
my whiskey), get excited and shout
extreme obscenities at your star player.
i like to drive fast, listen to heavy metal
(as loud as possible), and old muscle cars
(that honda hatchback is pretty lame paco)

i've done enough blow to
have the whole world numb.
written some of the best music
(in my career, i'm no mozart)
and lyrics on drugs that make you
incoherent and unable to function.

but it didn't make me a man...
it didn't make me a person...
it didn't make anyone think more of me...
maybe i should give you a hard time for looking like little john...

these things never made me...
these things will never define me...

i am me...
and you are you...

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