he made me sleep on the couch.
i mean, i asked,
but never have i not been
invited into someone's bedroom.
he said goodnight
as he turned out the lights,
and i lie on his sofa,
thinking about the invite
i never received.
what. the. fuck.
his self control and morals
had been stronger
than any feelings
he may have had
[[he told me he had]]
for me.
which only made me
want him that much more.
someone so strong
they could refuse sex
for fear of a lost friendship,
to prevent all those akward silences
that would surely result.
five years may seem like a large gap,
but our mentality and outlook
is nearly the same.
he is exactly what i want,
exactly what i need,
and exactly what i can't have.
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