Whiteness surrounds me. Cold, empty whiteness, not a spec of colour anywhere and of course the feeling inside me matches my surroundings, if you can call them that; loneliness, desolation, isolation. I take a step forward and find my boots echo off unseen walls. Boots? Since when do I wear boots that would echo off anything? Looking down I'm greatly surprised to see, no boots, but a long black silk dress covering my legs. I'm wearing a dress? Shaking my head, I pull the fabric up post my knees revealing the source of the echo - high black boots, covering my calves and they appear to be...leather...? Quickly I let the dress fall back around my legs and look up, shocked to see a full length mirror in front of me. I swear this "room" was empty before. But what is even more shocking is the reflection I see before me. The girl in front of me is wearing a black, silk dress, reaching the floor and covering the entire length of her arms, but the neck is but down into a sharp v-shape, the point ending low between her breasts. Her skin is fair and smooth and her medium brown hair hangs loosely around her shoulders, but her eyes strike me the most. They're dark brown, nothing special about that, but they almost appear to be clear, as if I can see right through them if I look close enough. Digging deeper I find myself entranced and become victim to her self inflicted pain and torture. Pulled by an unseen force I timidly reach out towards the girl but she only mimics my timid action and I finally realize it's only my own reflection.

With a gasp I pull my hand away and take a couple of steps back - again the same, impossible echoing. Placing a hand over my mouth to control the oncoming sobs I continue to watch the girl copy my own movements. Finally I turn around sharply and collapse to the floor in a heap. Everything goes quiet again, except for my unashamed sobs but I soon stop, feeling the whiteness taking over again. Who would have thought it'd be more smothering than blackness, but it is and finally I'm forced to look up to keep from screaming out insanely. This time a little girl stands in front of me; she looks about six or seven and those same eyes that lack all innocent a little girl should have. But how is it I did not notice her before or hear her approach?

"Why do you cry? You look so sad," her voice is small, timid and shy, yet it carries more wisdom than you'd think possible.

I blink, as if trying to understand the question, then quickly dry my face off with both hands as if it'd erase the fact I had been crying.

Then with all the impatience of a child, she forgets the question and asks a new one, "Would you like to some hide with me? Sometimes it keeps the demons away."

I nod and slowly rise to my feet. Eagerly she grabs my hand and starts walking in a random direction, but she seems to know where she's going.

"Do you want to know why I'm sad?" Her voice is the only other sound, aside from the echoing of my boots.

And again I nod, not having the energy or will to speak up.

"I'm sad because I haven't seen my dad in a long time, but my mom says he's a bastard any ways."

Why does that sound so familiar? Looking down I go to say something to her but she quickly interrupts me, making me lose my train of thought.

"We're here!"

I look up and am startled to find we are indeed 'here'. A couch with blankets and pillows built up around it was I guess her place of destination, but I swear it wasn't there before.

She turns to me, tugging at my hand, "This is my special hiding place, so I trust you not to tell anyone, okay?"

I nod for the third time, honoured she would chose me to trust.

Smiling, a smile long withheld, she turns and ducks, disappearing into the mass of pillows and blankets. Dumbly, I stand there not knowing if she wants me to follow but my decision is quickly interrupted as bare feet are suddenly heard padding towards me. But there's another accompanying it; a...wet sound, like someone walking with wet, bare feet across a tiled floor.

Curious and scared I turn around to face the approaching figure, but the curiosity is quickly overrun by fear at the new sight before me. A naked woman with blood covering and dripping off various places on her body, some dried, some apparently fresh. Her hair, the same length as mine, is darkened and covered it as well, making it hang in bloody tangles about her face. As she steps closer I notice she wears a crazed grin across her lips and a bloody butter knife held tightly in her hands in front of her, which only alarms me more, causing me to take a step back a small hand on the back of my stops me. I glance back to see the little girl leaning out of her sanctuary of pillows and blankets, touching my leg.

Looking up at me, her eyes revealing fear and concern. "You shouldn't be here now," was all she said before disappearing again into her haven.

Of course this only proves to startle me more as I turn back around to face the approaching figure who had stopped no more than two feet away from me. And in that brief second before she spoke I realize her dark brown eyes had a familiarity hidden behind the insanity, with a fear when one realizes they're about to die a second before their last breath. Her deep eyes not only match the little girls but the reflection I had seen as well. Quickly, my mind races with thoughts. Could this be an alter ego? Or perhaps a split personality of some kind?

Before I could come up with any more deductions her voice interrupts me, a voice so smooth and calm it proves to be a sharp contrast with her outer appearance. "Do you know what it's like to have your hands covered in blood? To have the smooth thickness running through your fingers and over your skin, hmmm?" She pauses, waiting for an answer, but I couldn't respond. My voice was literary stuck in my throat, what would I say any ways? But she quickly continued even if I had found a voice to speak with, "Have you ever killed someone? Have you ever held that kind of power?" Her body shuddered even as she spoke, "I know you've dreamt about it," taking a padded step closer, she continued in her calm voice, "I know you've wanted to feel it cursing through your fingers, I can see it in your eyes."

My eyes? Unconsciously I took a step back and this time nothing stops me, but it causes her to step forward again, holding the bloody knife out towards me.

"Take it, feel the power electrify your skin." Her eyes then took on a life of their own, dancing in the unseen moonlight and for a second something inside me said yes to her. Something unspoken, unheard, but understandable and she sensed it. Finally she takes one last step forward and pushes the blade against the bare skin of my chest and all at once her voice, the words she had just said come flooding into my mind. I force myself to close my eyes as the fresh blood from the knife seems to caress my skin, like some familiar lover. Just as I was starting to embrace the feeling, the pressure on my chest ceases and I open my eyes in time to see the knife clank against the floor, almost in slow motion, and she was gone, not even leaving a trace of her bloody footsteps.

I touch my chest only to find the smooth red liquid gone as well, but nearly jump out of my skin as a little voice speaks up beside me, "Why didn't she kill you?"

Startled (a complete understatement), I turn to the little girl on my right, now finding I have a voice, but nothing to say.

"She doesn't like many of us, but I guess she likes you," she nods, as if she had just discovered something new.

The knife forgotten about and I wouldn't be surprised if it had already disappeared, I went to say something, I'm not quite sure what, but she interrupted me, and for a brief second I wondered if I'd be able to actually say something if I ever had the chance.

"I like you too, d'you know who else would like you?" She grabs my hand and pulls me in another random direction and I once again become conscious of my echoing boots. Gathering my composure I take the time to glance around and try to take in my surroundings, but what surroundings? There's just white! How far it went I can't tell, there's no shadows and no apparent source of light. With a sigh I turn my attention back to where we're walking, but we had already stopped; without my noticing it?

The little girl tugs on my hand and points to a figure on the floor ten feet away from us.

"She would like you," the little girl nods, then shakes her head, "but she doesn't talk much. In fact, she doesn't talk at all."

And I'm suppose to get through to her? But before I could make up any protests in my head the little girl pushed me forward from behind until I stood beside the figure and I could now tell she looked about my age. She has her knees hug to her chest and rocking every so gently as if trying to comfort herself. Feeling compelled to do something I kneel down beside her, my dress folding itself easily around my legs as I do. Her features hidden, I gently reach out, brushing back her loose brown hair, but nearly jerk back seeing her face looks exactly like mine.

She must of sensed my slight movement, for she turns to me with big eyes so brown and dark I immediately lose myself in them. No wonder she didn't say anything for those orbs of sorrow said all I needed to hear. All at once I understood everything about her, why she felt the way she did, why she was trying so vainly to comfort herself, as if she was relating my own story to me. Being more than I could take, I force myself to pull back, letting her hair fall to cover her face again.

And as if on cue I hear two pairs of footsteps behind me. No leaving my kneeling position I turn slowly, cautiously, but is relieve to see it was the little girl and another woman. Both of them are clapping and dancing to an invisible song. They look like a mother and daughter dancing together, each dressed in a light, summer dress, the colour of the sky...if there was a sky. I glance back but my "twin" was already gone without another sound. Standing up, I turn to face the other two again, the silk of my dress unfolding around my legs.

They stop in front of me, out of breath, red cheeked and happy. The woman, who looks no more than thirty, giggles and bobs a curtsy, brown curls bouncing around her face. A curtsy? So elegant and graceful too, I have never seen anything like it before. The little girl giggles in turn and tries her own curtsy, mimicking the woman with little success.

Smiling and hiding another giggle, the woman turns to me with eyes so bright I could only wish I'm as happy as her in twelve years. But looking closer I find that same familiarity shining through the brownness and my hopes of being happy grow a little stronger with the encouragement.

"Bright day to you," she says, her voice light and soft as it reaches my ears.

The little girl giggles again as well, not because of something funny, but out of pure happiness. And indeed everything around me seems to turn into a bright summer's day with a soft breeze coming from nowhere along with the smell of lilacs. Yes, real lilacs. I close my eyes, for the moment ignoring the two who stand in front of me, letting my sense become alive to these new, wonderful stimulation's. I can't remember ever feeling this alive, the breeze brushing through my hair, caressing my skin lightly and the sweet smell of lilacs teasing my nose. Finally I force myself back from the heaven and open my eyes. The woman still stands in front of me, smiling softly, along with the girl.

I wanted to say something, finally put my voice to use, but what words? "Thank you" didn't seem like enough and what exactly would I be thanking them for? "Who are you", somehow, wasn't as important as it normally would be. But -- something in the woman's eyes distracted me, for a moment they lost their serenity and flickered with panic. She takes the little girl's hand, murmuring something about having to leave and turns to walk away. Confuse I wanted to stop them, but the little girl turns to me over her shoulder, giving a reassuring smile with a little wave and then turns back around and continues to walk away.

Once I see they're not going to come back I turn around myself to see what had drove them away, half expecting to see the crazed naked woman again. Instead I see another woman rushing towards me, dressed in white clothes like something you'd see in a mental institute and her hair looked like it had gone unbrushed for weeks. In her rush she must of tripped or something for she stumbled forward, but caught me by the shoulders to keep herself from falling. To keep myself from falling as well, I take a step back and grab a hold of her elbows, pulling her up. But still she keeps her grip on my shoulders, her finger digging painfully.

She looks up at me, panicked, trying to catch her breath and for a second her eyes caught mine; again, the same unsettling familiarity.

"Are you one of them?" Her words come out in breathless gasps and before I can ask "who" she answers her own question. "No, of course you're not one of them, you look too nice." She gulps, still trying to catch her breath, then looks around the two of us, paranoid. "Are they after you too? They're after me," she nods, looking up at me with those startling brown eyes. Then releases one of my shoulders to tap her head with a finger. "They're in my head, give me nightmares at night." Her eyes grow wide then, as if realizing something and she slowly releases my other shoulder, taking a careful step back. "They sent you here, I know they did." Then her eyes flicker, catching something behind me, which causes her to grow even more frightened as she turns and runs away, almost fading against the white background.

I can't help but blink. Fading? Forcing myself to give it no more thought, I turn around and nearly stumble backwards at what I saw. A huge black spider sits on the floor, bigger than my head, like the kinds I've only read about. It seems to tilt its head, its...fangs twitching slightly as I take another step back. If I look at it much longer, I know I'm going to faint. Swallowing hard I tear my eyes away from it and take another step back before turning to run. But I quickly stop in mid-step, seeing another spider five feet away from me, exactly the same as the first one. I'm being surrounded? glancing over my shoulder I see the first one was gone and I was force to come to the conclusion the two spiders were indeed the same creature.

Slowly I turn my head to face the one in front of me, but this time something was different about it. It was changing...growing? Yes, growing, but changing shape as well. I force myself to keep my eyes open as it grows taller, four of its legs shrinking to nothing, its eight eyes melting into two and its fangs taking on the shape of teeth as the rest of its body take on a human form, until it looks like a perfectly shaped woman. She stands tall, dress in black leather pants, a black shirt covering her arms but coming down to a point between her breasts, much like my own dress, the whole outfit tight against her skin. Her black lips slowly curl into a half grin as her dark brown pools for eyes catch sight of mine.

I, myself, stood frozen, unable to comprehend what had just happened and remain unmoving still as she slowly closes the distance between us. Each movement graceful as her black boots echo off nothing, her silky brown hair, which flows down her back, moves ever so slightly as she moves forward.

"I didn't think you'd be so easily frighten," her words roll off her tongue and past her lips like melted ice cream.

Still I don't move as she stands in front of me, a few inches taller than myself, her mere presence overpowering my movements.

"But I guess we all have our fears, hmmm," her smooth voice somehow calms me as soon as it touches my ears, though her gaze digs deep into my eyes. "And we all seem to have our hidden secrets." As she says that, something in her eyes shifted, turning from calm and smooth into pure sexual energy, her body almost radiating it. And just as quickly I feel compelled to reach out to her, run my finger over her jaw-line to her lips, but still I remain unmoving.

Instead, as if reading my mind she reaches out herself, taking a hold of my chin with her thumb and forefinger and tilts my head up to meet her lips in a kiss. I don't pull back nor resists and I don't think I could even if I wanted to as her kiss sends unreleased passion and power through my body, bringing sense alive that I had never felt before. The kiss seems to last forever as it grows more passionate, her tongue gently probing my mouth as if searching for something. I become so entrance I can't remember closing my eyes as I barely feel a small tugging at my hand, which hung at my side. Slowly I open my eyes, my senses slowly returning to normal, and I'm shocked to see the spider woman is no longer in front of me or anywhere to be seen for that matter.

The tugging still persistent on my hand I turn to see the little girl standing beside me again. Seeing she finally has my attention she motions for me to come closer, so I knee down in front of her, still trying to gather my wits about me. She leans closer still, her small hand passing over my eyes as she whispers, "I think you've seen enough," and that is the last thing I remember before the blackness overtakes me.

If you [Log In] as a member you can discuss this work with others