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"A Bad Goodbye" by darth ren

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It lurked in the shadows
It took her by surprise
It found a way into her heart
With love as it's disguise

It waited there idol
For the perfect time to strike
It drained from her all she had
Left her with no fright

She had no tears to cry
Had no blood to bleed
The only thing left, to die
This was her only need.

Fearless there she stood
Atop this place so high
And there she took her one last step
She forgot to say goodbye.



notes: i wrote this a few years ago and just recently found my old notebook, so ill be posting some more of my older work i guess!


© 2006 darth ren

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Comments on A Bad Goodbye

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On Friday June 20th, 2008, Bluegirl (246) writes:
This has excellent flow. ;) Nice job!


On Wednesday November 8th, 2006, wicked flesh (32) writes:
That was a very good poem. Structure does make poetry nice...although I personally don't do it very often. XD


On Wednesday November 8th, 2006, Silver Shadow (70) writes:
I loved the third section best. ~Silver~


On Wednesday November 8th, 2006, SilentStalker (1320) writes:
...the rhyme is almost head on, which is good for us poets, and the rhythm is damn near perfect as well; I also niticed that you kept the actual story going well, even with the restrictions of a rhyme scheme...


On Wednesday November 8th, 2006, SilentStalker (1320) writes:
... these formatted writes suit my reading preferences precisely, and have me hoping that the writer strives to make the next even more immmaculate than the last...very well done on this...


On Wednesday November 8th, 2006, SilentStalker (1320) writes:
...I enjoy reading such efforts; shows me that there are others that have a sense of structure in what they write...


On Wednesday November 8th, 2006, darth ren (40) writes:
well if you like structure, my poem "shroud of darkness" is a lot better than this one i think


On Wednesday November 8th, 2006, heartdripsblack (772) writes:
nice done. dark. write. i liked it. made me smile.



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