11-1-07

  sadness conquered my heart again
opening up the flesh to bleed;
to bleed deep into the graves
of a wish that was wished
into nothing but thin air;
as my hands folded in two
I begged you to rescue me
from nothing meaningless that
the sun smiled at today.

  shaving the blood close to the skin
I mastered the art in seeing
everything that hated me forever;
as one drink turned into two;
and two drinks turned into three
I grasped your soberness that only
laughed at me as I turned cold.

  because I've never known the feeling myself
of being free from my addictions that
twisted the noose to turn bold;
deep into the lines that
just kept on going and going
until they screamed to stop!!!

  painted faces I saw all around me
as I dreamed one last time
of a dream come true for me;
I saw demons dancing
a song of victory for my death;
and I heard devils laughing;
calling me, "Insane."

  I threw my last prayer away
as everyone I knew forgot who I was;
hell; even I forgot what I was about;
and the sadness reaked of my flesh today
as I drank into the
pointless acts taken from a lost soul
who despised himself of what
he has become!!!

  silent the sounds turned
into a madness unleashed that
forced my soul to turn upside down
and bleed back into the eyes
that caused my hate to force its way back through
my definition of a repented life come true.

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