one last time

i haven't cried in years
not since my son
got sick
and i learned
how tough
you got to be
sometimes
just to get by

it's been even longer
since there's been the kind of love
where you can't get someone out of your head
and every inch of her skin
makes fire in your belly

there's been laughter,
that's for sure
but not like
when you're young
and stuff's
piss your pants funny

though these years
circle around
faster each time
so that you don't even really remember
what it was like
when a day was a long time

there's always that hope
for something intense
enough
to make you sit up
and take notice

and care enough
to feel
without
reservation

one
last
time