a real love, hmmm what will it cost me this time?

nice concept, but unlikely the existance of it will ever be mine

always telling me only what you want me to hear

all your lies have shattered my heart and stripped my soul bare

false words of your 'love', given to me like a down payment

used to purchase and own my trust, affections, body and spirit

so many promises I believed, left broken, your intentions were all ill

searching now inside myself for strength, this cost me my free will

loaned you my heart, offered my love, then waited with great anticipation

I trusted in what I thought was truth, led into being a fool of expectations

my emotions you owe, explination due! upon your deceit

you left me in puddles of damage and devistation, proof as your receipt

now more protective of my heart than ever, I'll stay hidden and lock it away

never to be seen or felt by anyone ever again..is where it will stay

holding onto all that is left of me, of the vision of a life I still long for

in this dying world I am left lost and alone,reaching for something more

lying here bleeding, I'll spend the rest of my life trying to heal

I cannot afford to love.... it has cost me too much to feel

 

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