One's Self As Determined by Circumstances Taken Out of Context

Ell drafted a paper
Though drunk, got a B minus
Dibrell proved God's existence
By quoting Saint Aquinas

Handi got ripped off
In a bit of sketchy dealing
While Josh was going emo
Since he loves to hate this feeling

Gary said that soda here
Is rather overpriced
Liz lost her virginity
Alexa has found Christ

Chris went to the Salvo
Where he bought a couple shirts
Adelaide said in a dream
"I know how much this hurts"

Sanford formed a punk band
With Paul playing the drums
Katie baked an apple pie
Now all that's left is crumbs

Levi broke his own guitar
Laura looked quite stressed
Logan got off speed at last
And Morgan's still depressed

Mike from up the hall
Smokes his ganja by the ounce
Sells in Pennsylvania
In rather large amounts

Sara down in ResLife
Caused the dorm some tension
She found out about Tim
And had an intervention

Tim said alcoholics
Are those who still deny
The lifestyle they live:
"I'll drink until I die"

Grace looked so endearing
As she listened to the lecture
Tessa touched a mural
To admire its rough texture

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