DarkPoetry -|- Delphoid-Q -|- The Cautious Man

The Cautious Man - Sonnet 4

I am the cautious man – the foolish man –
Forever waiting for my fortune’s turn.
With tender hand I sculpt my life-long plan
And watch the present in obsession burn.

When aught goes wrong I wail o’er my fate
And shake my fist at any who will brake –
Then do I on others’ sympathy wait
For what right have I to make a mistake?

Yet now I see my folly as it is:
The poor ranting of a spoilt child
Not content with the bounty that is his
Whilst adding to the vices highly piled.

I see my life is wrong and hope to change
By adding fruitful virtues to my range.

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Comments on The Cautious Man - Sonnet 4

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On Sunday March 5th, 2006, Marek (140) writes:

Well, this is the first of your four that I would call a sonnet, the rhyme scheme in the others was right, but I guess you found out about meter for this one? Being somewhat critical I know-

On Sunday March 5th, 2006, Marek (140) writes:

In the third stanza, the middle two lines just drag a bit because the meter is a little off. A suggestion/example of perfect iambic pentameter- line 3 in that stanza could be 'Unhappy with the bounty that is his'

On Sunday March 5th, 2006, Marek (140) writes:

Always alternate stressed and unstressed syllables, unless you are playing with meter to a purpose. Glad to see another person that has some gumption to delve into the poetic 'scene' and history beyond dp. :)

On Monday December 6th, 2004, suicideseason (2141) writes:

Incredibly intelligent.Well done.

On Monday December 6th, 2004, An Expired Member (35) writes:

...many copliments on my works are greatly appreciated. feel free, at any time to add criticism as well. thanks, and keep up the good work...

On Monday December 6th, 2004, An Expired Member (35) writes:

wow...i love it when a poem expresses what i would like to say but cannot for whatever reason. check out poem"excuses" by Bukowski. your poem-the first stanza is brilliant and the end(your fragile parts exposed) is quite a punch of eloquence. your many co

On Monday June 28th, 2004, aXe FactoR (428) writes:

beautifully written. -MeL-

On Thursday November 20th, 2003, Urban Shipwreck (985) writes:

Very beautifully written. I know that I sometimes get so wrapped up in my future endeavors that I forget to enjoy what I've accomplished in the now. Very well done. ~Urban Shipwreck~

On Friday September 26th, 2003, Aurora_Light (574) writes:

i'm not sure what to sat to this great job i do believe who have found something few do never stop writeing

On Monday September 15th, 2003, Loneal (118) writes:

... very honest ... and great rhythm! Lol! =) I'm still trying to figure out this sonnet thing that you seem to be light years ahead of me on. ;) ... ~L

On Friday September 12th, 2003, Crystal Passion (257) writes:

Wow totally blew this lil girl away.

On Tuesday September 9th, 2003, Velvet_Raventon (697) writes:

Ah one of the most beautiful sonnet I've read these days! I am so glad you respected the structure! When all this sonnet story began I even wrote "How to write a sonnet" to get people to write such a materpiece =)

On Tuesday September 9th, 2003, Velvet_Raventon (697) writes:

I just noticed that you disappeared from my fav list... *puzzled*... I'll add you right back... =) Velvet.

On Monday September 8th, 2003, GreekPhilosopher (181) writes:

Ahhh... At Long Last. So: Im Glad Your Doing The Pondering And i See That You Still Doing The Sonnet Thing. Great Write... Because I Know. It Must Be Said, However, That The Rhyme Flow Is A Bit Off... But Thats Just Nit-Picking. Yay. GPhD.

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