You’re my tainted heaven
An angel with a crack in his halo
A star that means nothing while standing in the glory of the sun
Statistically, just another tragedy of war.
Personally, just another tragedy to hang another weight on my heart
Honestly, you’re sitting across from me with glaciers for eyes.
Glazed over and too cold to see me trying to love you.
You’re not in love.
This ring was a promise meant to be shattered.
A promise promised by another soldier
To another girl.
Both of us have changed
formed into people who can’t find solace in each other’s arms
Killing has changed you.
You have changed me.
(Slowly, I fold my legs under me
Watching you breathe)
I don’t know how to walk out the door.
I simply shake my head when you say to do so.
(How could you not want to hold me?)
I’m a mess
Wrapped in a thin layer of tears
And guilt
For not being able to save your soul
And help your spirit stay alive.
Neglect brought this on.
My letters filled with passion and Victoria’s Secret Love Spell
Weren’t enough to make you want to stay.
I wasn’t enough.
I’m not enough.
I think I’m understanding that I’ll never be enough.
Please don’t forget about me.
Please don’t forget about what we had.
You’ll leave for war again.
(I’ll never shed a tear
You don’t need pity and fear from another stary-eyed girl)
.
.
.
I hope when you come home
You may find me
And let me know you’re alive.
And hopefully your spirit will return
You’ll be the same person that loves to wrap his arms around me
And smile
And run his hand across my cheeks
So that the tears will be erased.
.
.
.
Maybe you’ll love me.
I accept I’m not enough.
Accept this as my goodbye.
(Accept this as my love.)
© 2005 A Soldiers Girl
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Printed from www.DarkPoetry.com/dp/10671/71651 on Sunday July 06th, 2008 09:38 PM
Certain elements © 1996-2008 Matthew Steven (matts.org)
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